Okay, so i have not reported in awhile, needless too say, things are not exactly easy for me right now, i have been having alot of emotional breakdowns coming at any and every time of the day...I am getting severely depressed and really dont know which way to turn anymore. I feel so lonely and like i dont have anyone. I think i really made a big mistake by startin to hang out with Fred again, I want to see her and I want to spend time with her but its so emotionally hard, cause i feel like she can only be bothered with me when she wants..... I am so lost and dont know what to do anymore. I have found that I hold all emotions in all day long, and at the end of the day I just break and go into the most hysterical cry imaginable....I love her with all myheart adn I miss my old life and all its problems, but I know right now is not the right time for us to be tryin to get back together, we both need the time to heal from everything that has happened recently and everything in the past, otherwise I feel taht it would only be another failed attempt at our relationship....Also I have not had a period in almost 60 days, I dont really no what to think of that considering how regular I am...Hopefully it will be here anyday...